What tha....?

I have been rounding up some fun Madeline stories for a blog post when today she presented me with one that can stand on its own. Here we go....

Yesterday I came home from work and as soon as I walked in Madeline said, "Mom, I did something really bad at school today and Dee Dee (the bus driver) is going to tell the principal. You are going to get a call!" If this was the first time these words had come out of her mouth I may have freaked out or my blood pressure may have even risen a little, but no, I stayed calm. I asked why and she proceeded to tell me a strange tale of lunch table conversations mixed with riding the bus home and even threw in a little writing on trees just for the fun of it. Apparently she said a bad word- the f-word. I asked her what the f-word is and she could not tell me (shock). So, I said that I would talk to her teacher about it the next day or when I got a call from the principal we would work out what happened.

This morning I walked her to school (with my posse) and I had a chance to talk to her aide (Madeline has her own teacher's assistant who is awesome) and her teacher. According to them Madeline said the bad word at lunch. Her aide talked to her, calmed everyone down and thought it was finished. Then there was recess and Madeline got all worked up and came in to the classroom in tears "devastated" by her bad behavior. They calmed everyone down even though Madeline kept trying to make a big deal out of it. She kept reminding her classmates what she had done (so helpful). Then it came time to get on the bus. In the bus line Madeline decided it was time to yell the word at the top of her lungs. Nice... So, as I was talking to her teachers about the situation in the lunch room the vice-principal comes and chats with me about the bus yelling incident. Very appropriately, I told him that I guess I should stop yelling that word all day at home. Where does Madeline get her sassiness?

Now we are to this afternoon. I see Madeline walking up the sidewalk talking with a neighbor who is looking at Madeline with a mixture of amusement and shock. I come outside and start talking to Madeline when she starts yelling, "MOM, THE WHOLE SCHOOL KNOWS WHAT I SAID YESTERDAY, I SAID F-U-*-*!" Oh yes, she spelled the word loudly in our front yard! This is a child who has passed maybe two spelling tests ever, yet she seems quite knowledgeable about this particular spelling word. Well, I did what every other mom would do and quietly yell, "get inside, what are you thinking?" Once inside I say, "Madeline what is going on? Is this still about yesterday? Okay, is **** the word you said?" "Yes" Madeline said. So, I proceeded to calmly say the f-word about 10 times. "That is the word-right?" I said. Madeline just looked at me like I was crazy. "Well, there, I said it. Why is it such a big deal? It is just a word, people say. We do not say it at our house and we do not think it is appropriate, but it is just a word. So, stop it."

I will let you know how it goes, but she seemed so shocked by my outburst that it has not come up again. I honestly think she was trying to get attention and this was working quite well at school. Her awesome teacher handled it well, but he was vastly outnumbered by little people. The principal told me it is quite an issue right now with the older kids, so I felt oddly proud that Madeline was having a "normal" issue. Am I sick?