It has been too long…

With school starting I thought I would have a lot of extra time. Time to nap, watch endless amounts of girly shows, read, and (most importantly) bake. Well, that is not the case. I have somehow gotten busier than before. While I am not chasing after Timothy or finding things for Madeline to do quite as much, I am now realizing how much I neglected during the summer. It is crazy how much work gets ignored when you are running around like a crazy person trying to survive the “break!” All this to say, I have not blogged in a while and I really need to. The problem with me is I have a very tiny memory for cute stories and the like (there are other problems with me, but can we please focus on one at a time?). My brain has a hard time remembering what it is supposed to be doing now, much less what has already happened. I prefer to live in my little world where the past is the past- it was great and happy, but it is gone now. Josh makes fun of me because I somehow forget just how hard certain situations have been or that some of them even existed. Oh well, I like my happy place! Now I just have to remember some of the last few weeks. Here are the main events:

1. Josh passed the Bar!!!!!!!!!!!! Need I go on? Here is a pic of him getting sworn in this afternoon- it is now completely official. Now he can sue anyone (in Oregon)!

2. In Timothy’s class they had to section off the room because he kept escaping (how much does that make me feel better?It is not just me!).

3. Sadie has started Kindergym (a much cheaper version of “Little Gym” classes done through our Parks and Rec department) where she is a maniac! The child has no fear. One of her favorite activities is the balance beam where yesterday she jumped continually across it. She is a tad scary, but hugely cute. Her sense of humor is really blossoming (what do you expect from a child with Josh and my genes put together? She better be funny!). The other day she climbed up next to Josh while he was feeding Timothy. When Josh looked over she was in Madeline’s sunglasses and simply said, “Coooooool.” I know I am partial, but that is really cute. Oh, and Sadie has decided to not call Josh "Papa" anymore. This morning she told him, "No Papa! Father!" So, I guess he has a new name.

4. Madeline has been doing really well in school. Everyday we get a report card for the day. This also includes her behavior on the bus. Well, last week when Madeline came home the bus driver told me to make sure I read her card, she had a tough afternoon on the bus. So, I excitedly took a peak and it said, “Loud talking out and criticizing my driving!” What exactly am I supposed to say to that? The loud talking I expect and truly have no other words to ask her to stop. I have pretty much given up and expect her to be a tour guide one day for partially deaf people. I decided instead to focus on the “criticizing my driving” part. I asked Madeline if she knew how to drive, she responded no. Then I asked if she has ever driven a bus, she said no. So, why then do you feel you need to criticize or instruct the driver? “I don’t know…..” She says. Well, I asked her to please leave the driver alone and then reminded her the following morning. When she got home the next afternoon apparently the same thing happened. So I talked to her again, but then emailed her teacher and asked her to remind Madeline. Her teacher (who I love by the way) said that they would have a bus training session the next day. When Madeline came home I got a good report. When I asked her about the day she very excitedly talked about the bus training game they played. She retold the story at dinner and Josh asked why they needed to do this (I guess I forgot to tell him about the issue) and she said, “Well Papa, you see some of the kids have been having troubles on the bus and my teacher felt they needed some practice (said in a very sad and compassionate tone). I guess like me (said in a very quick and quiet voice).” Oh Madeline, I wish I could be privy to your thoughts sometimes.

Well, that about does it for now. I am sure I will remember more, so I guess I will just need to write it down sooner next time.

735, 755, 1145, 350

No, these are not lottery numbers or lucky numbers (well, not to everyone at least). These are the times a bus stops in front of our house every weekday. School has started! I guess that is old news, but I am still excited. I, for some reason, had these dreams of school starting and life magically becoming easier. Though I am most definitely enjoying the extra time to work, I am now reminded of just how much I was not able to accomplish this summer. I am on a marathon now trying to catch up with lofty hopes of one day getting ahead. Not to worry, this is just a dream- I will not get my hopes us.

Well, Madeline is in a new school and loves it! I was so concerned about her transition and the drama that would ensue, but it turns out I am seemingly the one most affected by it all. I am a mess! I miss her old school and want to go back! I don’t like having to learn all the new rules and regulations. I picked her up the other day and was completely traumatized. What is happening to me? I used to love change and everything about it, but now I completely thrown off by any hint of it. Our fridge broke last week and I told Josh that I was sad- not because of the money (though that is the actual worst part), but because I liked our old one and simply did not want to change it. Anyway, Madeline has jumped right in and is doing great. She is in a smaller more specialized classroom that seems like it will be a good fit. There are 6 students at this point and 3 teachers- can you believe it?! I get a note home each day to let me know how her day went. Well, the other day the note said, “Madeline had a good day today! She is having a hard time staying in her seat during independent work time though- She likes to ‘pop-up’ and help others.” This is not unusual for Madeline, sitting still has never been her strong suit, but the fact that they can not keep her situated when there are 3 teachers in the room goes to show you how much fun her past teachers must have had. I mentioned this to Madeline’s teacher from last year and I think it made him feel a lot better.

Timothy is another story. I don’t know how much he actually likes school (seeing as he does not talk and such), but I do know that he adores the bus. Having it come everyday is like a dream come true! He patiently (and by patiently I mean the complete opposite- he goes berserk) waits every morning and can hardly contain his excitement when it rounds the corner. I think, more than anything, he likes the routine, but it sure is cute seeing him get so excited every morning. That is, until this morning. I am doing everything I can to keep him from hurting himself, myself and/or the house while waiting for the bus to come. Finally it came 10 minutes late and I walk with/get dragged by him to the bus only to be told that they do not have a car seat for him today. His usual bus needed work done and this one was not equipped (his normall bus has them built in the seat where you can just pull out the center and viola- a car seat)! She said that it was not in his file and suggested that I just put him in a seat belt. After I controlled the urge to say all sorts of sarcastic comments I calmly mentioned that there is absolutely no possible way

he would stay in his seat and he can even get out of a 5-point-harness when he so desires. I mean, he is not quite 30 pounds (which is hard to believe- I think he is made completely of muscle because when he jumps, hits or head butts you it feels like more than 30 pounds), so it is illegal to not have him in a seat. Well, I just had to change my plans for the morning and take him to school. So what if Sadie did not get to really eat breakfast? Who cares if I had an enormous list of things to do that did not include spending 40 minutes carting Timothy to school (the school is not close)? Ahhh…the joys of being a mom! They really do need to have a book or some type of disclosures you have to sign before mommy-hood commences.

Red, Orange, Yellow, Blue...

Some of you may not be too impressed by what I am about to say, but being the mom of two special needs kids before #3 came along, my viewpoint is skewed. Last week I was walking around outside with Sadie (19 months old) and asked her to pick the yellow flower (thinking she would just pick one or I was going to point at the yellow flower). She proceeded to point at the yellow flower say, “Yellow” and then pick it. Coincidence? No, she then picked out the white and purple flowers. She has since replicated this new talent and I am completely impressed. I keep underestimating her and then being surprised when she does something so genius! Oh typical children…

This made me think, of course, of what we went through to teach Madeline colors. Seeing as how we spent a little while teaching her English we did not push things like colors or shapes. Why would we? Well, once she was headed to pre-school I figured it was time to really start working. You probably already know this, but Madeline has a bit of a strong-willed personality. Mix that with the effects of fetal alcohol syndrome and you can get in some interesting situations. I remember time and time again I would say the colors of things and then ask her what color something was. Inevitably she would tell me every single color she knew except the actual color. I am not exaggerating! I would point to a pink flower and ask, “What color is this?” (this is after going over it) and she would say in her shaky dramatic voice, “Yellow? Green? Blue? Orange?...” Every color but pink. I laugh now, but at the time it was very frustrating. Thankfully she now knows her colors, but this trait has moved onto bigger and better things. For example, any time I ask her which direction we need to turn or tell her to tie her left shoe, etc she will say or do the opposite. I would say 90% of the time this is true. Even if she were just guessing she would have better odds (I am not taking her to Vegas- that is for sure)! Now, I am sure that there is a perfectly logical explanation for this and I should probably ask her doctor, but for now I just laugh to myself and understand that at some point she will get it- it is really not that big of a deal.

As for Sadie, I guess I need to start really working with her- who knows what she can learn? I certainly don’t.

29 days- can we make it?

Well, summer school is over and we still have 29 long days until school begins. Can we do it? Today my nanny was not able to make it to work- so much fun. I was lucky enough to have a friend help me for a few hours because I had an appointment. I did, however, get to bring all 3 kids in search of Nature Camp for Madeline. Apparently, I signed her up for one that is 25 minutes from our house. She has done nature camps in the past and the facility is only about 10 minutes away, but not this week. To make matters worse I showed up on time (crazy, I know) to the place we thought it was only to be turned away and rerouted. By the time I made it back home (9:45) I had to immediately leave for an appointment then go get her (it ended at 12:00). It is already a short camp, but the hour of driving makes it even that much more fun. I should get a lot done this week for sure!

Speaking of school, Madeline graciously gave me yet another funny story. During the few weeks of summer school the bus picked up both Madeline and Timothy. This is normal for Timothy, but not for Madeline. You see, the Special Ed bus comes right to the door- what service! Timothy gets so excited he can hardly stand it and basically runs out to the bus where I strap him into the 5-point harness that is built into some of the seats. According to the bus drivers on the way home it is considered a good day if Timothy only gets out of his seat once. She had to pull over on the highway once to get him back in. I guess they don’t fasten it tight enough despite my continuous pleas. Anyway, Madeline was happy to wait out front for the bus and even thought it was cool to be dropped off. On the first day though, Madeline came into the house and asked, “Why does my bus have seatbelts?” Goodness, how do I answer this without sounding degrading? I think I said something like, “Well, these are newer buses and they just happen to have seatbelts.” Luckily she bought it. I did not have the heart to tell her that she will now ride the Special Ed buses. Since she will be going to a new school next year that is across town she will again be on the short bus. I joke about how lucky I am to have 2 kids on the bus with the tented windows! This means that each and everyday I will have 4 buses stopping at my house! I think the neighborhood kids might come and wait by our house assuming that the bus stop has moved. I guess there are perks to having such special little ones; sometimes I just have to think outside of the bus, I mean, box.

This is an old pic, but I thought it would show what it is like to keep Timothy from running like a mad man- maybe I should do this rather than chase him like a crazy woman to the bus. I guess a little extra exercise is not a bad thing... Oh, and that is my brother Benny (I guess he did not feel like chasing Timothy anymore).

Well, I don’t mean to brag, but we actually made a trip- to Texas no less- without any drama. From start to finish everything went really well. Seriously, nothing crazy happened. There were plenty of opportunities for disaster. I mean the plane rides alone can offer drama and mishap. We had a layover each way, which was actually nice- gave Sadie a chance to run around. Madeline had the exciting opportunity to go to Dallas with two of her cousins and my mom. This was the first time she was away from me and home at the same time. I shuddered every time I thought of it and started praying for my mom about a year ago. My mom showed that she is a strong and daring woman- way to go mom! Madeline was, for the most part, well behaved and listened to my mom (a few threats were made, but that is pretty normal). While they were in Dallas Sadie and I drove to Austin to visit some of Josh’s siblings. Sadie did really well on the drive and we had a great time! I can really go on and on about what a great time we had and how much fun it was to hang out with my entire family- it is not often that we are all together at the same time. I love my family, but am happy to be back in Portland. It always helps me remember how much I love where I live. Now I just need to convince them all to move on up and start enjoying the weather and scenery. They are all convinced (except my youngest brother) that we are all a bunch of liberal hippies. While I am flattered that they think of me that way I do remind them that we live in the suburbs.

All in all I am glad the girls and I had a chance to visit the Lone Star State in all its glory. Now, I am back to mild weather and very little humidity. I laugh when people complain about the mosquitoes and told my friend that unless you get swarmed by them while on your way to and from the car you do not have a problem. Now, here is a good photo to show you where I grew up- try not to be jealous!

We have the bed!!!!!

The new bed has arrived! We can hardly believe it!!! Timothy loves the bed and we do too. It fits like a glove in Madeline and Timothy’s small room. Hey, we are going for simple, so their room definitely fits the bill. He now loves to go in the bed and we have not heard him protest at all during nap or bedtime. There is plenty of room for him to sleep and play. I put the crib mattress in the bed with him to help with the transition and he has not even ripped it up yet- well, the custom cover has probably helped with that. One big change is that the bed is twin size, so I had to figure out a way to put on a mattress protector and sheet that he would not destroy on the first day. So, Lila and I headed to Bed, Bath & Beyond where we found a mattress protector that completely covers the mattress and zips up- nice... Then we bought a twin sheet in a lovely shade of blue (we are going for the whole- calming color- thing). Since he has an insatiable desire to rip sheets off (especially fitted sheets for some reason) We had to find a way to secure the sheet. With the help of Timothy’s OT we engineered a solution that will hopefully last more than a week or two. We went to Joann’s where we bought the strongest elastic possible. Then I sewed the elastic to make a large X on the bottom. It is quite a pain to put the sheet on, but it works. Now we will wish, hope, think, pray, plan and dream that it will be the perfect solution for all of us!

Here are some fun videos to see the difference in bed’s:

As soon as he gets in he likes to sleep in that corner- he really loves the pressure it offers. The whole sensory thing is interesting.

A little note about the bed- one of my blog readers did a lot of research after reading one of my pitiful stories. She was so super super nice and found a few options she thought might work. Her top pick was this bed which we bought from http://noahsworldllc.com/ . They were incredibly helpful, I would highly recommend them! Thanks Christy!

I guess I am a real woman now...

I am sad to say that my excuses of pregnancy and hormonal challenges have lost their effectiveness. What am I talking about you ask? Well, I have been writing off my frequent crying as a temporary nuisance. Historically, I am not a crier. I always said that I didn’t have anything against it, but secretly I did. I thought it was a tad weak and just annoying. I even made fun of someone in high school that cried at the movie Armageddon (not nice poking fun, but pretty rude stuff- I am still ashamed) (hey, it was a Bruce Willis movie for crying out loud- she was really crying loudly). It all started when I was pregnant with Sadie (I had a brief bout while on fertility drugs, but quickly got over it- thank God). I wasn’t crying everyday or having emotional breakdowns, but the occasional tear would escape when, say, an Olympics commercial would come on or someone would die in a movie. Naturally I blamed it on the crazy hormones whelming up within me (why is that necessary to grow a baby?) and just knew that it would go away once the redhead vacated the premises. Hey, I even gave allowances for post-partumness. Sadly though, I can no longer blame it on Sadie. She is 19 months old (I can, however, blame the pooch on my stomach on her- something the other two did not cause).

What is happening now is insane! I had no idea it was this easy to cry. I am not a blubbering crazy woman or anything, but my eyes fill with water way too often. I tear up at things like stories people tell me (happy or sad), a song at church-(well, pretty much everything at church-), good news, bad news, stupid little mistakes (like, burning dinner or running out of cereal when that is all I want in the world), seeing someone pulled over or stalled on the highway... It is ridiculous!!! I can no longer claim to be an emotionless creature. How sad (I am not tearing up, I promise)… Is this how life is for others? Will I be like this forever? God help me! Maybe I should start taking some testoserone or something. Shoot, I don’t want chest hair. Maybe I am just learning to deal with life in a new way. I am most definitely more understanding of others emotions and would rather cry than yell at someone. Crying can make people feel sorry for you while yelling definitely does not.

I still do not officially say I am a crier, but my guess is that will change. What is the actual amount of crying necessary to make one a crier?